I think "foundation" is going to be our word of the year.
Every New Year's Eve, I reflect on the challenges of the year and hope for a more prosperous new year. This year I've come to realize that there will always be challenges for us. Gabe and I unfortunately do not have simple lives with years of calm and stability in between challenges; our lives have always had extreme challenges each and every year. For example in 2008, my father died in August and then Gustav was born in September.
Last year Gabe lost his full-time job and he was underemployed (teaching one class) for the fall semester. On top of that we had to evict my tenant in November. Not only did she owe several months of rent (I was reluctant to evict a grandmother with 2 grandchildren), but she left the house in pretty awful conditions. So underemployment, the lost of rental income, and the huge expense of legal services and rental house repairs made 2017 pretty challenging. I'm not going to even get into politics.
Social media used to give me pleasure as I could see my friends' children growing up and see beautiful travel photos, but last year there was so much politics and need (people soliciting for whatever needs - their own, their kid's school, X charity, etc) that it became a mental drain. Gabe stopped tweeting and very infrequently visited Facebook. He instead decided to give up dairy and tried to exercise daily (yoga and/or spinning at the YMCA). I am thinking of doing something similar.
I have been reading more and that of course gives me great pleasure. Last year I read many more books written by authors of color (Brit Bennett, Celeste Ng, Lisa Ko, Mira Jacob, Kevin Kwan, Diksha Basu. Abraham Verghese, Angie Thomas, Angela Flournoy), and I was rewarded by many hours of happiness.
Still, my reading probably contributes to my not being present enough. I've always been aware that these years with young children are so very short and I want to savor every non-aggravating minute. Although I have to say that both children adore me so much that they continually tell me that they do not want to leave my house;-)
I am hoping that "foundation" drives our decisions and actions in 2018 so that we can solidify what we have and build upon it. This year we will have some tough decisions to make:
As always, I pray for Gabe to find a job that will fulfill him creatively and emotionally. I don't even care about the money anymore as long as he can contribute at least the minimum that we need. He works so hard and he deserves something awesome and long lasting, which is not going to be found in the non-profit world. In a perfect world, he would get a full course load to teach. But of course in academia, being an adjunct doesn't pay the bills.
2018 will bring our usual challenges, but here's hoping that our foundation continues to be rock steady.
Every New Year's Eve, I reflect on the challenges of the year and hope for a more prosperous new year. This year I've come to realize that there will always be challenges for us. Gabe and I unfortunately do not have simple lives with years of calm and stability in between challenges; our lives have always had extreme challenges each and every year. For example in 2008, my father died in August and then Gustav was born in September.
Last year Gabe lost his full-time job and he was underemployed (teaching one class) for the fall semester. On top of that we had to evict my tenant in November. Not only did she owe several months of rent (I was reluctant to evict a grandmother with 2 grandchildren), but she left the house in pretty awful conditions. So underemployment, the lost of rental income, and the huge expense of legal services and rental house repairs made 2017 pretty challenging. I'm not going to even get into politics.
Social media used to give me pleasure as I could see my friends' children growing up and see beautiful travel photos, but last year there was so much politics and need (people soliciting for whatever needs - their own, their kid's school, X charity, etc) that it became a mental drain. Gabe stopped tweeting and very infrequently visited Facebook. He instead decided to give up dairy and tried to exercise daily (yoga and/or spinning at the YMCA). I am thinking of doing something similar.
I have been reading more and that of course gives me great pleasure. Last year I read many more books written by authors of color (Brit Bennett, Celeste Ng, Lisa Ko, Mira Jacob, Kevin Kwan, Diksha Basu. Abraham Verghese, Angie Thomas, Angela Flournoy), and I was rewarded by many hours of happiness.
Still, my reading probably contributes to my not being present enough. I've always been aware that these years with young children are so very short and I want to savor every non-aggravating minute. Although I have to say that both children adore me so much that they continually tell me that they do not want to leave my house;-)
I am hoping that "foundation" drives our decisions and actions in 2018 so that we can solidify what we have and build upon it. This year we will have some tough decisions to make:
- move Gustav to a high achieving magnet school that is closer to our hosue
- continue to rent or sell our Maryland house
- send the kids to Thailand for the summer
As always, I pray for Gabe to find a job that will fulfill him creatively and emotionally. I don't even care about the money anymore as long as he can contribute at least the minimum that we need. He works so hard and he deserves something awesome and long lasting, which is not going to be found in the non-profit world. In a perfect world, he would get a full course load to teach. But of course in academia, being an adjunct doesn't pay the bills.
2018 will bring our usual challenges, but here's hoping that our foundation continues to be rock steady.